So You Want To Visit The Ortus Commune

We get it - there’s a lot of money to be made by ferrying around members of the Ortus cult. Compared to your average Progress Point denizen, Ortus members are the kookier clientele. A mixed bag of harmless degenerates and armed survivalists. But with all cult folk being banned from auto-taxis, you can find your niche. One driver’s illegality is another driver’s opportunity for profit.

Before you jump headfirst into their wild world of fish, furs and feral fervour, here are some tips to leaving their dominions in one piece.

The Mystery Leaves With The Passenger

Ortus followers are experienced proselytizers and spend countless hours trying to get everyone who will listen to join their baffling cause. Some would joke that they could persuade water bears to affiliate if only they could find megaphones tiny enough.

And while Ortus offers a rich assortment of birthing centres, multi-partner marriages, and roadkill couture, you might not be ready for the work ahead. Think very carefully if you want to become an Ortus member, taking what they say with a grain of sea salt.

Don’t Forget - Be Agreeable

Sometimes it’s best to just smile and nod with Ortus Members than to bait them into an argument. Keep them happy, regardless of where the conversation takes you.

ːsteamthumbsdownː Don’t Say: I thought you cult folks marry your cousins and pop out a million babies? ːsteamthumbsupː Do Say: Wow, I bet little Tarragon is a blessing. They’re your 8th child? But you look so amazing!

ːsteamthumbsdownː Don’t Say: Who wants to live in an overcrowded dump?! ːsteamthumbsupː Do Say: There’s just a rustic charm you can’t find anywhere except Ortus.

ːsteamthumbsdownː Don’t Say: Why would I join Ortus? I prefer warm baths and hot food. ːsteamthumbsupː Do Say: I’ll have to check with my partner first. But I think they’ve had their eye on a fixer-upper hut.

Illusive Illegals

You can commonly find the Commune of Ortus in tightly knit enclosures. Their most popular spot is a large cave they’ve hollowed out to shield most of Progress Point’s prying eyes. You’ll find the rare Ortus member extolling through the alleys of Neon District, but mostly it’s best to keep going back to the source.

When you do visit the cave, just don’t look up. Every point of light you see above you in the cave is another home and another member of Ortus. It can be a dizzying spectacle so keep your eyes on the flyway ahead.

Don’t Accept Food as Tips

While it might sound like a smart idea, after all, good food can be rare in Progress Point, don’t accept any seemingly edible items from Ortus members.

Their primary source of food, transportation and hygiene is the same river running through the Ortus cave, and obviously, there is some overlap between all ventures. The Central City Medical Authority cannot guarantee admission to one of their hospitals after ingesting anything swimming or crawling within the Ortus River. Trust us; we’ve tried. Best to just decline.

Tip of the day: Look into upgrading your food controls early to avoid awkwardly declining Ortus food. By simply having Kelp Wrap’s ™ handy within the confines of your cab, you have a perfectly good reason why the water bug being offered to you is just “too much” generosity.

Questions?

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